She Does Not Fear Rightly

Fear of God, Fear of Man, and Lordship as the Gospel of Domination in Carnal Woman

I. The Axis

“She does not fear God enough to fear me rightly.”

A woman who will not fear God will not honor her man. One who refuses to tremble before the Lawgiver, must scoff at the authority He appoints. It’s the law of sin.

By nature, a woman wants a man without weight. A husband without authority. A lord without a rod.

To deny this as a woman, to say, “No, I don’t,” is like a man saying, “I don’t have anger problems,” or “I never lust after anything.” These are shallow spirits. We must learn to grow up into more.

A woman, by nature, wants the comforts of Christ without His order, the blessings of covenant without the hierarchy of heaven, the covering of a man without the crown God placed upon him.

Man is not so different. But man is very different.

For both, the fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom. For her, this means doing everything he says without complaint or argument. But she says: “I can’t obey you when I’m afraid of you.”

Translation: “I want a man who is always beneath my judgment. I want no holy gravity in your voice that causes me to reflect or repent. You are not allowed to rebuke me. I accept no awe, no dread, no accountability in love or romance or libido. I want a manageable man, who stays in my lines—one whom I feel superior to, who I don’t have to wait on, who I am morally and emotionally more virtuous than by instinct. The feminine insight is my wisdom to define and deploy at liberty.”

She does not know what she does. She is not thinking this through. This is just how she feels.

Scripture speaks: “Let the wife see that she respects (φοβῆται / phobētai / fears) her husband.”

(Ephesians 5:33)

Phobos—the same word as “fear of the Lord.”

Righteous terror. Holy awe. Beautiful reverence. Devout trembling.

Natural (“modern”) woman rejects these things out of hand. This is why she cannot see man rightly. This is why she receives him as an emotional rival rather than a boundaried covering. This is why she takes his advances as oppressions rather than shielding. This is why she treats him like a toy: she has no King.

Forget not, Men of God:

⚔️ A woman cannot honor you until she fears God.

⚔️ A woman cannot fear God while enthroned as queen of her own house.

⚔️ Until she bows her knees to her husband, her talk about bowing to the logos is seen in her actions as hypocrisy, hot air, and, sadly, outside of Christ, “a woman’s way.”

Expect her to tirade in emotional overspeak at any man does not submit.

Do not rise to the bait. Your offense, O Man of God, is simply not to be moved. To remain. To stand—not in rage, not in despair, not in self-pity, but in awe of the One who made you male, in the gravity of the charge He gave you: to bear His image in strength, to represent His order, to lead with weight, even if the world hates you for it.

Your presence is a witness. Your witness is judgment. And that is holy.

II. The Serpent’s Desire

From Eden’s whisper through Jezebel’s reign to the polite pieties of modern church homes, the same desire speaks: “She wants a lord she can move.”

Not a husband—a marionette. Not a covenant head—a poseable doll. A figure of strength only if it bends to her will. She calls him lord—but only with her lips. In truth, she is the hand behind his movements. This is not submission. It is control in the language of covenant.

“Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.”

(Genesis 3:16)

As we saw yesterday, this is not romantic longing. The Hebrew reveals usurpation—a battle of wills. She desires not him, but his throne.

So she clothes manipulation in devotion:

“I just need you to be more like…”

“God wouldn’t want you to…”

“You’re scaring me.”

These are not appeals. These are levers of inverted power.

The tragedy: Too many men play along. They think peace is worth the cost. They’ve been taught by their mothers that love means yielding—calling, presence, voice, peace of mind.…

To yield your rule is not love. It is abdication.

Do not be steered by fear. Do not believe in rejection. Know who holds the power of your Name. See the scars in His hands as your crown. No matter what she says, He will judge it rightly.

So do not be moved by the accuser’s lies, most especially in the mouths of those you are called to Shepherd.

“They know not what they do.”

Your spine must be rooted in fear of God, not her mood.

“The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe.” (Proverbs 29:25)

Let her want a lord she can move—but be unmoved. Be like Christ before Pilate:

“You would have no authority over me at all unless it had been given you from above.” (John 19:11)

He was silent not because He was weak, but because He was immovable.

III. More Teshuqah and Mashal

Hebrew Text:

וְאֶל־אִישֵׁךְ תְּשׁוּקָתֵךְ וְהוּא יִמְשָׁל־בָּךְ

Ve’el ishekh teshuqatekh, vehu yimshal-bakh.

Teshuqah – “Desire” Appears only in:

1. Genesis 3:16 – Eve’s desire for her husband.

2. Genesis 4:7 – Sin’s desire for Cain.

3. Song of Songs 7:10 – Covenant desire in love.

In Genesis 3 and 4, the context is predatory. It is not “I want you,” but “I want your place.”

Yimshal – “He shall rule”

Root: mashal – to govern, reign, assert dominion. In Eden’s order, headship was unforced. After the Fall, it became contested territory—his rule a necessity, her desire a rival claim.

The structure is not complement, but conflict. God warns: You will try to control him. He will (must) rule over you.

This is the Battle. Every Day.

IV. Psycho-Social Pattern of Usurpation

Inversion of Order: Creation → Woman → Man → God’s Word twisted.

Tactics of Counterfeit Submission:

• Tone as weapon.

• Guilt as chain.

• Affection as currency.

• Threat as leverage.

• Religion as disguise.

She builds a woman-centered home, then calls it Christ-centered. This is covenantal witchcraft:

“For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness as iniquity and idolatry. (1 Samuel 15:23)

V. Covenant Restored:

Choose to Trust in Covenant Hierarchy

Marriage is covenant, not contract. It assumes hierarchy—not for oppression, but for order.

“The husband is the head of the wife as Christ is head of the church.” (Ephesians 5:23)

When you reject headship, you reject the image of Christ. In the household, the battle of wills becomes not a quarrel, but a war against the decree of God in the man’s heart, the accuser’s animosity as the conjugal spirit of the home. A man in such a crux has one option: patient endurance.

VI. Application for Men

1. Do not be moved by tone. Discern emotion from subversion.

2. Speak the Word clearly. No apology for truth.

3. Name the game. Don’t wrestle fog—cut through with Scripture.

4. Call for repentance, not negotiation. Covenant repair starts with Christ’s lordship. Lead by doing. Be repentant. Stand alone.

5. Fear God more than her rejection. To yield in disobedience is to be Adam again.

Facts:

A woman who does not fear rightly does so because she is running from the fear God according to his Lordship is the Father of Nature. Yet without that fear, no person can honor, much less be honored, rightly.

The calling of a brother is to stand as men—not as toys, not as softened, not as eunuchs, but as Christ, double-edged sword in mouth, scars on breast and brow, appointed Lord, Owner and Master of his home, bearing the weight of glory that is the wife, the children, the Name, the legacy.

The unmoved lord is not a tyrant, no matter what the fearless call him. He is a man anchored in the fear of Jesus Christ, the root of all knowledge and wisdom, and the antidote to folly.

He is sufficient to lead your heart.

His cross does not bend.